I'm not entirely sure what I'm doing.

Why I didn’t go to class today.

Also, because it’s cold outside.

 I’m still mad about Little Foot “not” being a Brontosaurus; like how I’m mad that Pluto is “not” a planet.

mastathrilla:

Happy 5th of November. 

Had to give a group speech presentation today.
We seriously thought of starting out with “Remember, remember, the fifth of November”

(Source: humblebragged)

Uh, duh. Better question, why do you still read it?!

Guys are not hard to figure out. True story.

Dear Mr. Thatcher,
I have been a loyal user of your ‘Always’ maxi pads for over 20 years and I appreciate many of their features. ….
Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from ‘the curse’? I’m guessing you haven’t. …
..you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it’s a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend’s testicles into a George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought Grey’s Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!
The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants… Which brings me to the reason for my letter. Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: ‘Have a Happy Period.’
Are you f——— kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness, is possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you’re some kind of sick S&M freak, there will never be anything ‘happy’ about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and lock yourself in your house just so you don’t march down to the local Walgreen’s armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.
For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you have to slap a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn’t it make more sense to say something that’s actually pertinent, like ‘Put down the Hammer’ or ‘Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong’, or are you just picking on us?
…
Always…
Wendi Aarons
Austin , T X 

i am so not a “flowers” girl. i would rather have the subway. they both end up in the same place, and the subway just does more for me.

instead of flowers, cards, candy, or jewelry, i will take:

• tickets to concerts and//or sporting events
• wine.
• food.
• music.
• electronic things, like a blu ray player to go with my stupid LCD TV.

now you know.